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With apologies to the lyricists of “Kissing with Confidence”19:
Do you want to dance with this person? Then be honest — what is keeping you from dancing with confidence? Worries. Some of them can be put to rest if you ask yourself a few simple questions before dancing.
Is your breath fresh?
Do your have spinach on your teeth?
Is your deodorant strong enough?
Dancing offers a variety of benefits [Happiness Is……A Kilt & A Pirouette], [Burn Fat Meet Chicks], and [Dancing And Health]:
Dancing offers the chance for an activity outside of the home environment — and hence, offers a focus for dressing up, grooming, pampering, etc.
Dance classes are usually a group (communal) activity, and offer social benefits of meeting people outside of the immediate social circle.
As we watch various couples walk out on the dance floor, we often think to ourselves: “I wonder what sort of people they are”. Within a very few minutes we have our answer. For very quickly such traits as timidity, aggressiveness, consideration of others, arrogance, and such characteristics reveal themselves when people dance.
Arthur Murray — [How To Be A Good Dancer]
These characteristics will be revealed far more when we dance with a partner, rather than watching them dance with others. Hence, dancing can aid social networking — allowing more sexual interactions, making it easier to meet potential partners in a non-threatening atmosphere [Good Dancers Make Good Lovers, Says Survey] — dancing may even enhance your creativity ([Creative Types Have More Sex Partners]).
- Join a dance class
Any will teach you to move your body in a sexier way, which boosts body confidence. Some — like bellydancing — openly encourage you to connect to your sexual self. Classes like ceroc and salsa involve lots of body contact, forcing you to get you used to touching other people. An added bonus: you never know who you might meet!
Tracey Cox — [The DIY Sex Makeover]
Learning and rehearsing keeps the brain active.
Dancing provides the opportunity for a form of (low-impact) aerobic exercise, with all concomitant benefits. For example, dancing may help flexibility, coordination and strengthening (leg) bones.
Obviously, dancing will have other physiological effects — for example, without necessarily viewing dancing as “the vertical expression of a horizontal desire”, there will probably be a few pheromones wafting about.
Learning to dance well, might even make you more attractive! Dancers are more likely to have a higher level of fitness, stamina, flexibility than the general population — social dancers may also have a greater willingness to improvise and experiment — which may be useful traits for other non-dancing activities!
All exercise, including dancing, encourages the body to produce endorphins (natural opiates) that act as mood elevators and are also responsible for pain killing and stress relief in the body, that can induce feelings of mild euphoria (“a natural high”20). Exercise can also have slight anti-depressant effects due to the production of serotonin.
The late Michael Argyle (a social psychologist at Oxford Brookes University) concluded that the most pleasurable activity to take part in is dancing (and in particular group Scottish dancing). A variety of other research has been conducted into dancers and dancing21, e.g. [Why good dancers are attractive], [Symmetrical People Make Better Dancers], [Comfort For The Rhythmically Challenged — Blame It On Your Genes, Not The Boogie], [Cheerleading Can Kill: Official].
At a ninety minute Modern Jive freestyle, I took about 4,500 steps (as measured with a pedometer) — approximately a two and a half mile walk.
Other dance forms can be extremely demanding — for example, an unpartnered hip-hop, or twenties-style Charleston class can be almost as energetic as an aerobics class.
It can be difficult (if not impossible) to find details of exercise and dancing — the closest information source that I have found are running magazines, such as Runner's World and Running Fitness — these often include details of nutrition, exercises, injury prevention, etc. Additionally, running magazines often feature clothing suitable for even the most energetic Modern Jive workshop, such as breathable tops, sports bras, tracksuits, etc.,
Modern Jive is not normally a vigorous form of exercise, although it can be when dancing to fast music. In particular, followers are more likely to get more exercise, as the natural reaction for most (slightly lazy) leaders is to lead less strenuous moves for themselves — at least one teacher is rumoured in jest to dance without moving his feet at all, although perhaps they are moving so quickly that they only appear to be stationary.
Table 1 gives an approximate guide to the number of calories burnt for each dance (for several body weights) — a kilogram of fat contains roughly 7,900 calories.
50Kg | 60Kg | 70Kg | 80Kg | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
Fast, e.g. Lindy Hop | 280 | 340 | 400 | 450 |
Medium, e.g. Modern Jive | 260 | 320 | 370 | 420 |
Slow, e.g. Ballroom | 180 | 210 | 250 | 280 |
Note that the figures are for continuous dancing, so classes and social dancing probably won't yield quite such a high calorie expenditure; social dancing may only provide say 50–60% of the listed figure due to sitting out some dances, waiting for long musical introductions, or wandering to the bar. High calorie (alcoholic) drinks, or snacking (after the dance) will also negate any calorie deficit derived from dancing.
You are more likely to hurt yourself when tired, ill, unfit or new to dancing — so consult your doctor before dancing, if your lifestyle has been sedentary, or if you are pregnant, or have a medical condition — especially when symptoms might be masked, e.g. if using painkillers or strapping. It may also be advisable to mention any health issues to your dance teachers. Strenuous “acrobatic” moves, i.e. jumps, leans, or drops, should be avoided if you have back, knee, or other problems. “Listen” to your body and take account of any nagging aches or pains. — any injury (even a seemingly minor one) should be treated seriously, as they may worsen over time or act as a weakened area where a more serious injury may occur,
If it is particularly cold, then warming your hands before dancing might be a good idea — depending on where you are likely to hold your partner.
Increasing your flexibility will help your dancing; if you think that warming up, flexibility and stretching is “cissy”, then look at [Marine Corps Daily Sixteen]. Make sure that you don't immediately join a freestyle or class, and warm up (in the sporting sense) and stretch your muscles thoroughly before dancing to avoid strains ([Stretching], [Stretching and Flexibility Frequently Asked Questions]) — especially in winter. Even a basic warmup will be helpful, especially if you will be dancing any quick, or “abrupt” movements — for example if you spot when rotating, then warming up the neck (and shoulders) before dancing is a great idea!
Dance-specific exercises and stretches are difficult to obtain, however Bob Anderson (the author of [Stretching]) has devised a specific set of Tango stretching exercises.
Similarly, cool down and stretch well after dancing.
Check your shoes regularly and replace them if they wear out or do not provide enough support — obviously keep laces tied tightly.
Even under the best-regulated conditions accidents and injuries will occur.
The general acronym for soft-tissue injuries is RICE(D): Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation (and Doctor).
obvious, but many dancers will keep dancing with a niggling injury (risking it worsening) and never giving it enough time to clear up.
I keep a large bag of peas in the freezer as a cheap, easily moldable ice pack.
wrap ice inside a towel, rather than applying the ice directly to the skin.
raise the affected area above the heart where possible.
if symptoms persist, visit Accident and Emergency, or your local GP.
Complementary techniques, such as applying arnica to bruises, etc., are claimed to speed healing. Some people also use dietary supplements, or complementary medicines. A tens machine might also alleviate some aches and pains.
Confusingly, leg pains may not necessarily be due to a leg injury per se, but can be due to “referred pain” stemming from a (lower) back problem. Even more confusingly, leg pains may be due to both a leg injury and “referred pain” stemming from a back injury.
Cushioned plasters are useful if you get blisters. Foot sprays can help to refresh your feet during a long evening of dancing — and can certainly improve your chances of getting a relaxing foot massage. Painkilling sprays and gels, e.g. ibuprofen gel, can help soothe aching feet if you are dancing at a freestyle.
Ideas and techniques for injury prevention can be found in: [How To Dance Forever — Surviving Against The Odds] and [Dance Technique And Injury Prevention].
Ideas and techniques for injury recovery can be found in: [Stretching], [Sports Pilates — How To Prevent And Overcome Injuries], [Beating Sports Injuries — Through Conventional And Complimentary Methods] and [Sports Injuries — A Self-Help Guide].
Tell your partner!
Consult your GP beforehand. For example, you may need to drink more fluids to keep hydrated, and also need to take care not to overheat the foetus.
Leave enough time to digest any (heavy) meal if you will be dancing strenuously — at workshops, it may be better to eat smaller meals more often.
Never refuse a (breath) mint — preferably bring your own!
It is important to eat sensibly22 — however, fishy, spicy and garlicky foods, or strong alcoholic liquor, may be best avoided before a dance or lesson, so that your partner is not overwhelmed by your bad breath, especially as Modern Jive is danced close together.
A rough approximation to an isotonic drink from a “pub” bar, is equal parts unsweetened fruit juice and water (with an optional grain or two of salt — perhaps from a peanut, or two).
An alternative recipe that approximates a commercial sports drink is:
One pint of water.
Three tablespoons of sugar.
An eighth of a teaspoon of salt.
Dash of lemon/lime.
Dehydration reduces (sporting) performance and concentration, and hence increases the risk of injury, additionally, dehydration can promote “dry mouth” increasing the risk of bad breath (halitosis) — so drink plenty of liquids at long classes or dances.
I can often tell when leading, whether a follower has been drinking (alcohol) — many subtle leads are missed. I resort to leading more basic (double-handed) moves and limit the number of spins and turns for the follower — ultimately, the dance degrades so that it drifts off the beat, and becomes an exercise in protecting your partner until the music finishes.
However, avoid large amounts of alcohol (especially leaders) — Dutch courage is more likely to impair, than improve, your concentration and dancing. Alcoholic fumes can linger persistently which can also overwhelm your partner (especially in a close hold). Similarly, “power drinks” should be treated with caution, sometimes they may leave one partner “hyped-up” potentially dancing at a faster rate than their partner.
Supplements, such as glucosamine, chrondroitin or cod-liver oil23 are claimed to help joint health and flexibility. Similarly, complementary medicines such as bromelian, ginger extract, and devil's claw are claimed to relieve aches and pains.
You can “guarantee” when you skip a shower and sprint to the class, the teacher will spend ten minutes describing a move in excruciating detail while your partner is stood half-turned under your hand (next to your sweaty armpit). Luckily, some venues provide complimentary cans of deodorant, breath mints, and even soap!
Modern Jive is danced in close together in open and closed dance holds — sometimes extremely close, depending how comfortable both partners are with each other. Hence, personal cleanliness (including an effective antiperspirant deodorant), a good dental hygiene regime, and clean clothes show your consideration and respect for your dance partners — and thus are important, especially if you hope for a (second) dance. If your (shorter) partner is leaning away and repeatedly breathing to the side (away from you) — or even turning their head to breathe (as if swimming front crawl) — this should be a “subtle hint” to investigate whether you have body odour, halitosis, or other condition.
Everyone has their own tips for keeping cool — I wear a t-shirt as a base layer and a shirt to offer a dryer outside layer.
You will sweat if you are dancing vigorously (during the Summer), or are just in a warm venue. Practically, sweaty hands make it harder to maintain a grip (think about drops) and can make turns faster than intended, and catching spins problematic. Clammy hands and soggy shoulders will make the dance unpleasant for you and your partner. If you are sweaty, then towel down. Otherwise, you are likely to shower your partner in a spray of sweaty droplets when you spin rapidly — or drip sweat on to your partner in a dip, or drop — so bring a towel to wipe your hands and mop your brow. Similarly, extra change(s) of clean clothes are strongly recommended to keep cool, dry and fragrant.
If you are doing a day of workshops, it is probably a good idea to take several layers, so that you can stay cool during class, but can keep warm (and supple) during any rest breaks.
Unlike most sports, Modern Jivers do not often shower at the venue — let alone a team bath!
It is a good idea to bring dry clothes for after a dance, or at least a warm coat — to cool down gradually.
My pet peeve is to see a partner moving round in a class cough into their hand, and then have them offer that same hand for me to hold for the next part of the lesson — it is probably a good idea to wash your hands regularly when dancing during flu season. If you have to sneeze or cough suddenly when dancing, then it is probably best to turn your head away from your partner and sneeze into your left shoulder (to minimise any aerosol effect) and to ensure that you don't dance any moves requiring you to take hold of that shoulder.
Please be considerate if you are suffering from a cough, or cold.
As most moves are danced with a handhold, your fingernails should be clean, smooth, and preferably short. Obviously, robust waterproof sticking plasters should be applied to any cuts, or grazes.
When leading a follower with long nails, options which should minimise the possibility of getting scratched include:
Reducing the amount of dancing in an open hold, and use moves based around closed holds instead.
Adjusting moves so that the lead is from hips, shoulders, etc., or by modify the conventional hand-to-hand hold to use a hand-to-wrist hold.
Long nails, while considered fashionable by some, can cause problems when dancing, especially if the hand is clenched so that the nails dig in to your partner's hand, e.g. during a catapult-style lead. Some dancers may consider long nails as a reason to excuse themselves from dancing with you.
Colognes, aftershaves and perfumes should be subtle, i.e. not overpowering at close quarters. Hand lotions and creams should be applied thoroughly, your partner may be allergic to them — greasy hands are also difficult to lead or catch.
I find that fixing my fringe with hairspray keeps it from blocking my view if I start sweating — using a couple of coats of hairspray (letting the first dry well before applying the second), gives a rock hard hold that survives most energetic freestyles.
Style long hair, so that it doesn't “whip” your partner during turns, or spins — fixing your hair will also prevent it catching fingers, e.g. during Combs.
A majestic form and graceful motions will express themselves through the most barbarous and tasteless costume.
Percy Bysshe Shelley
The choice of outfit depends on the event and venue, but cool, comfortable clothing is recommended, as you may be dancing for several hours. Fringing or layering, will help give some extra movement emphasizing twists, turns and spins — but avoid beading or sequins that may scratch or snag your partner, or loose billowing clothes that can trap arms. “Slippery” fabrics and clothes with a loose lining, can cause the leader's hand to slip (possibly leading an outer fabric layer) and fail to lead their follower clearly.
Leaders should check that their clothing will not hide their leads, e.g. that a hand offered behind the back will always be visible.
You might also consider how suitable your clothing is for dancing, for example if it is liable to undo — obviously any knots should be tied securely (in a double knot), whether it will slide around (as your partner's hand slides around your waist), how its material copes with sweat, or whether your kilt or dress will flare up unexpectedly during fast turns (especially when making rapid changes of direction).
Trousers with turnups may catch high heels if there is a lot of intricate footwork. Similarly, overly long trousers are also a potential trip hazard.
Dresses with “spaghetti straps” can be somewhat problematic, as the straps often fall off the shoulder while dancing, necessitating frequent readjustment — this can be somewhat alleviated by using fishing wire, or similar, to create an “invisible” link between the two straps. Similarly, strapless dresses, such as ball gowns, can pose problems when dancing for other reasons — it appears that specific double-sided sticky tape products, such as body tape (toupee tape), can help keep material firmly in place.
Trousers are probably cooler than jeans are for dancing — beware chafing! I recommend a belt if you have recently lost weight and wear baggy trousers — you may need to improvise a lot when dancing and holding your waistband.
A full-skirt, or slit-skirt, or trousers may be more suitable than a long straight skirt for dancing lunges, or any acrobatic moves, especially jumps and splits.
Generally no shorts, sleeveless vests, or boots. Possibly no t-shirts, jeans, or trainers.
A “regular” suit, shirt and tie for men. A cocktail dress for ladies.
For men, a dinner suit, i.e. a dinner jacket (DJ, tuxedo) and trousers24, with (notionally) a white (possibly wing-collar) shirt and black bow-tie — hence, black tie. For ladies, a ballgown (or cocktail dress).
For men, a tailcoat suit, i.e. (optional top-hat) and tails, with notionally a white wing-collar shirt and white bow-tie — hence, white tie. For ladies, a floor-length ballgown.
A mask!
Remove body piercings when dancing (or at least cover them with a plaster) — at least one dancer has had their navel piercing ripped out as it caught in their partner's string vest during a competition showcase.
Jewellery and body piercings should be not be worn if you are dancing acrobatic moves. For example, chains and necklaces can become accidental garottes; and pendants, crosses, etc. may hit you in the face in drops.
In general social dancing, try to avoid sharp rings that can scratch your partner, especially if the stone has twisted round to the palm side. Similarly, avoid chunky watches, bangles, bracelets, or large belt-buckles, as these can snag your partner's hands, clothes, or hair. Necklaces, chains and bootlace ties should be secured so that they do not fly out when spinning. Large hoop earrings are also best avoided in case they catch in your partner's fingers, e.g. during a Comb.
Don't dance with mobile phones, keys, or other items, clipped onto a belt, these can snag hands, especially when sliding round the waist.
Do not dance with anything fragile, or sharp, in your pockets in case you fall over — for example, my personal organiser didn't survive my attempted double spin on a slippery floor.
Metal business card holders can be used to hold a (couple of) credit cards without the risk of crushing them, or using a bulky wallet.
For reasons of self-preservation, remove pens, combs, or other unbending items from pockets; they can be injurious in steps such as lunges. Similarly, remove keys, coins, and other sharp objects to avoid them bruising your partner — at least, move them to back pockets, or outside pockets (i.e. the left pocket for leaders and the right pocket for followers), so they will not rub against your partner in a closed dance hold.
Make sure that your glasses will not fly off when dancing; an extra strap may be useful when dancing acrobatic steps.
Avoid “loose shoes” and which may slip off easily (especially if you will be dancing any kicks), e.g. flip-flops (thongs), mules or loose sandals. A style of shoe with a definite heel can be useful for some ballroom dances, to get a clear differentiation between stepping on the ball of the foot and the heel. Dance shoes should also be comfortable and suitable for turns and spins — although, a degree of traction can be useful when leading moves that require support, such as dips or drops. Obviously, choose your shoes to suit the floor — some gymnasiums may prohibit outdoor shoes, trainers with (marking) black soles, or stilettos that may leave dents in wooden floors.
Changing shoes can help in varying your dance style — both psychologically — and physically, e.g. a smooth sole may help create more fluid, gliding, dance moves; whereas a trainer may help create a more abrupt hip hop style.
The support and padding in your shoes will eventually wear out — most running magazines suggest changing trainers after about 400–600 miles, which given the previous rough approximation suggests that the comparable lifespan for dance trainers would be 240–360 hours of dancing — although this may be overly cautious, since dancing is a lower impact exercise than running is.
It is a good idea to check your dance shoes regularly; loose or worn soles and heels can be dangerous. Similarly, aches and pains in feet, legs or back might be exacerbated if your shoes are worn and not providing appropriate support.
One easy way to try to ease tight shoes, or make loose shoes tighter, is to change the way that you lace them [Ian's Shoelace Site].
If your feet are getting bruised, then cushioned insoles, e.g. sorbothane, or disposable gel insoles (“party feet”) can be used. Note that any extra padding will raise the foot inside the shoe (which can cause problems if the shoes are tight, or have tight straps) and may also reduce your connection with the floor.
If you are hoping to buy shoes at an event, then it's probably a good idea to try and contact the stallholder beforehand to make sure that they can bring shoes in your size.
Hopefully, your chosen shoe shop should be able to provide a range of sizes, styles and colours to try. Ideally, there should be a tryout area with wooden flooring similar to a typical dance floor — obviously, it is important to be able to check shoes on a suitably representative surface.
Your feet will swell when you dance — it is probably best to buy dance shoes later in the day (wearing the socks, etc. that you would normally wear dancing) to ensure a comfortable fit. Obviously, try any new shoes thoroughly before dancing, or at least bring a spare pair — it is difficult to concentrate on subtle leads and follows when your shoes pinch.
I have had no problems with well-worn, conventional brand name cross trainers, even for double spins. I use conventional trainers on hard unyielding, medium–fast dance floors, or if busking outside on grass or concrete — I find that the rebound from a trainer air- or gel-filled sole helpful, especially for jumps — or when I am in a “bouncy” mood.
Some people avoid trainers, because the soles may stick when spinning, possibly increasing the risk of twisting a knee or ankle.
I use dance trainers on medium–fast dance floors, if I'm dancing moves involving “heels”, or if the routine has a more hip-hop styling. I used to have a pair of Capezzios that were great — unfortunately few places seem to stock them — so I'm now wearing Bloch's.
Like traditional trainers, dance trainers offer a high degree of comfort and cushioning. Dance trainers differ from conventional trainers in sole design and composition, for example, the composition may be more suitable for turns (or have a “sweet-spot” for spinning on). Dance trainers may also have slightly angled soles, that will encourage your weight forwards. Dance trainers often have split soles (with separate toe and heel parts) for greater flexibility, at the expense of reducing arch support. However, dance trainer soles can be relatively thick and inflexible, and may not necessarily give you as good a connection with the ground as say ballroom shoes.
Ballroom shoes have the advantage that they are suitable for more formal outfits — for example, trainers may seem a little informal for a black-tie event. My current ballroom shoes are by Freed, but I've worn Supadance ones in the past.
Men's ballroom shoes look similar to conventional men's formal dress-shoes (brogues), but are lighter but have relatively little support or cushioning compared with (dance) trainers. If you prefer to dance with your weight forwards (or even gain some height), then many “latin” (ballroom) shoes are available with Cuban heels in a variety of heights.
I use ballroom dance shoes on sticky or slower dance floors, or for Latin dances, where hip-motion is required.
Ballroom shoe often have suede or topi soles, and are thin and flexible, enabling the dancer to make a strong connection with the floor, i.e. be “well-grounded”. However, ballroom shoes can be less suitable than trainers for moves that take your weight completely onto your heels, as ballroom shoe heels have a sharp edge with little traction. Suede soled shoes shouldn't be worn outside of a proper dance floor as the soles will get extremely dirty, especially if worn outside. Many dancers carry their dance shoes in a protective shoe bag.
Lady's ballroom shoes have similar suede soles, but have relatively high heels, that may make them less suitable for Modern Jive although they are often worn for Salsa and Tango. Open-toed shoes are probably less suitable when dancing with beginners.
Inevitably ballroom dance shoe soles will collect dirt, getting “slicker” and faster — the soles can be cleaned with a shoe brush25, raising the nap of the suede for a safer footing. Note, that you don't necessarily need to clean (and slow) the entire sole — you can keep an area slick, say for spinning, or otherwise personalise the shoe's grip.
A useful tip is to tie any membership cards to your dance (shoe) bag, e.g. using a hole punch and string (or cable tie), so that you have your membership cards whenever you are wearing dance shoes.
Golf shoe bags often have a separate pocket for each muddy spiked golf shoe, making them a great option for dancers to carry two pairs of dance shoes.
Useful items to carry in your shoe bag (aside from shoes) include:
Spare shoelaces.
Shoe brush.
Plasters.
Breath mints.
Small towel.
Disposable (deodorant) wipes.
Antiperspirant.
Hairspray.
Make up.
Safety pins, for impromptu repairs (and competition numbers).
Headache tablets, or other painkillers (medications, contact lens solution, etc.).
Spare top, e.g. polo shirt.
Ideally, dancers should choose shoes to suit the floor — without resorting to lubricating powders, or other “remedies” — as there are several problems with using such powders:
The powder needs to be cleaned up after the event — this may make you unpopular with the event's organisers (or the venue) if you do not clear up afterwards. General-purpose venues may have prepared the floor with a stickier (slightly less danceable) finish, to reduce the potential for personal injury claims (due to slips, or falls). If dancers make the floor too slippery, then they (or the organisers) may be liable for expensive overnight cleaning — especially if there is also a contractual clause that the venue (and floor) be returned in its original (sticky) condition.
The dance floor can become “unpredictable”, with sticky areas and slippery ones.
A subtle technique I have seen, is to clean the a shoe with a neutral silicone based “polish”, together with a brief application to the leather sole (where it will act as a lubricant).
If you absolutely must, then dust your shoes and not the dance floor. In extremis, bare feet will grip well, whereas socks will slide well.
At one class the doorman, having had a couple of complaints that the floor was sticky, tried to solve the “problem” by liberal use of talcum powder while people were dancing! Instantaneously, the floor turned from slightly tacky into a skating rink — luckily everyone stayed upright, but it took considerable sweeping and mopping to return it to a danceable state.
Organisers should not change the “character” of the floor, e.g. by speeding it up with French chalk or talcum powder, or slowing it down with washing powder, grated candle wax, or washing it with diluted coca cola. — especially after people have picked their most suitable shoes (which will also get dirtied by the above remedies) — and certainly not while people are dancing.
You don't need to bring a partner to dance with at most Modern Jive classes — it is customary to rotate (swap) so that everyone gets a chance to dance, although some classes have separate rows for fixed couples, i.e. those who chose not to separate and mix with other partners during a class.
Talking quietly in the class, or while waiting on the sidelines, isn't a problem — however, talking loudly over the teacher is likely to annoy your fellow students, especially if you aren't taking part in the class. Don't forget to mute, or turn off, your mobile phone.
Classes are often categorised as follows:
Beginners
Improvers
Intermediate
Advanced
Note: class levels are only consistent within a given franchise, or organisation — a workshop intermediate level may differ from that at your normal class, so it's worth reading the class descriptions.
Unfortunately, organisers often assume a high degree of local familiarity, so it is important to locate your prospective dance venue beforehand. A number of useful sources include:
[Google Maps UK], [Microsoft Local], [Streetmap] and [Multi Map] are useful UK internet map resources — especially if you have the postcode.
[Google Maps UK] and [RAC Route Planner] are useful internet resources for route planning.
[Google Maps UK] can also be used to search for venues and businesses in a specific area (using an interactive map).
[192.com] can be used to check the locate local businesses.
[Yell.com] can be used to check the online “yellow pages” for local businesses.
[Find A Church], [Catholic Church In England And Wales], and [Methodist Church Of Great Britain], etc. can be used to locate churches and their associated church halls (that are often used as dance venues).
Tickets are just $1.50 — you get your money's worth the first fifteen minutes, and the rest is free!!!
Performed by Johnny Cash. — The Night Hank Williams Came To Town.
Try to check the venue before travelling: events in a “hall” can mean anything from an event at a stately home, a village hall, a school hall, or even a scout hut. Similarly, any event can be described as “a ball” with the dance held in the “main dance hall”, and while “Dress to impress”, “carriages at midnight”, etc. may seem somewhat up market, but is no guarantee.
Promoters will describe all events as “in high demand” and just about to sell out — unfortunately, this isn't always the case. However, if you are travelling a long distance, then it is sensible to buy tickets in advance, in case the event is sold out.
“Quiet” events can be somewhat detected before parting with your cash by checking the number of vehicles in the vicinity. Similarly, if the hall curtains are pulled tightly across to prevent people looking in, then this is probably an indicator that there may be only a few patrons inside (especially if curtains are pulled in the heat of midsummer).
A possible compromise is to have a drink beforehand outside of the venue — if you are driving you could also keep a spare bottle of water in the car for afterwards, this is also useful if you miss “last orders” (because you are too busy dancing).
Sometimes venues at schools or sports halls have vending machines with water or soft drinks — which is one way to avoid expensive bar prices.
If you are determined to smuggle in drinks, then at least bring a brand sold at that venue.
Venue hiring rates assume that dancers will buy drinks from the venue bar and not bring in drinks from outside — if you do bring your own drinks this could cause trouble with the venue for you and the organisers — especially, if you leave empty bottles behind of brands not sold there. If you do bring in drinks from outside, then the venue fee may be increased dramatically, or a corkage charge may be levied on you or possibly the organiser — and hence raise ticket prices.
A general tip is to try to find a class or event that has a school as its venue — these can be assumed to be non-smoking within the school — although it may not necessarily be smoke-free “behind the bikesheds”.
If you are looking for a smoke free venue for a particular class or event, then check [UK Jive].
I think dancers should choose a partner where possible before entering a class, e.g. by picking the nearest partner from a forming sin bin — starting a class on your own, and only then summoning a partner across with an airy gesture can seem a little inconsiderate, if not condescending.
Partners can pair up “randomly” to join a class, alternatively some teachers will organise a more formal pairing up to avoid people feeling “left on the shelf”. One pairing up mechanism is a “joining walk” where separate queues of leaders and followers partner up into dance couples in the middle — normally, couples keep moving round alternating to the left and right of the room gradually moving round into rows, or a circle, as required.
Rotating in class is a great way to mix with other dancers, and can often make it easier for shyer dancers to ask for dances during freestyle(s).
There are two basic ways that a class rotation is organised:
“sin bin”: spare individuals collect in a single location, when rotating those moving shift round the required number of spaces; those “falling off” the end collect back to the queue. Ideally, the moving partners and the stationary partners will count as people move around — this speeds the process and reduces any confusion. It's more important to count moving partners if you are near the end of a row, as otherwise the moving partner will be heading for the sin bin by the time that you realise that you are without a partner. Some classes have a separate “sin bin” per row.
“gaps (scatter)”: spare individuals are scattered into gaps between couples, when rotating those moving shift round one space as if on a conveyor belt (or rueda); some move to a new partner, some move into a “gap” — this technique works particularly well when classes are taught in a “circle”. If the class is in rows, then using gaps means that the last person will have to rush back to the start, if there isn't a gap at the beginning.
Ideally, “gaps” will be evenly distributed. If there are consecutive “gaps”, then those moving round will miss several consecutive turns. If the class is crowded, it is better to keep gaps around the outside of the class, so that those waiting do not obstruct partners dancing in the class.
If you are moving around, then it can be tempting to impress others with your counting abilities by moving directly to your next partner — however, this can disrupt other dancers used to simply following the person in front.
When changing partners, the process can fail for a number of reasons, e.g. people fail to hear the number moving or miscount, people drop out (perhaps due to a difficult class), others will join later. If you move around and find yourself without a partner, simply rejoin the queue (in a sin bin), or place yourself between two couples (to form a new gap). If you are stationary and find yourself without a partner, then collect a partner from the queue or select a partner from a “gap”. It may be easier to raise your hand, and draw the failure of the rotation to the teacher's attention, so that they can rectify it without having to leave and rejoin the queue — particularly if there are “multiple miscountings”.
If you are “resting” in the sin bin, or a gap, take the opportunity to dance your part solo — this will not only give you something to do, but will keep you up to date if new moves are taught while you are “out of circulation”. Dancing the move on your own also provides an opportunity to become confident in your own steps and movements, without the distraction of a partner moving at the same time. However, followers must be careful that they don't begin anticipating (after practising on their own) when they rejoin the class with a partner.
It's easier to join a class partway through if there are gaps; or joining at the point where partners “fall off” if a sin bin is in operation — to avoid confusing those counting their way around.
The late Michael Argyle (a social psychologist at Oxford Brookes University) concluded that the most pleasurable activity to take part in is dancing, and that the second most pleasurable activity to take part in is volunteering (especially over the long term). This may explain why people are keen to volunteer as taxi dancers — hopefully, it's not just for the perks!
Many classes provide taxi dancers (or taxis), i.e. volunteers chosen by the organiser to dance with beginners and encourage them — taxi dancers are often rewarded with free entrance, or other perk.
Taxi dancers can help out in a number of different ways:
Taxi dancers can drop in or out of classes to balance the ratio of leaders and followers, e.g. lady taxi dancers will often dance as a leader, when they are in the minority.
Taxi dancers often run consolidation lessons, repeating the beginners' routine while other lessons are taught.
Taxi dancers provide the opportunity for some individual attention — so make the most of them.
Taxi dancers can encourage beginners to dance (and mix) during a freestyle.
Taxi dancers can provide some unbiased feedback to organisers and teachers.
Reliable taxi dancers may provide a pool of talent for future teachers.
[Dance Volunteers] has some interesting (non-Modern Jive ideas on the responsibilities and motivations of taxi dancers (or dance volunteers). [Taxi Dancer Responsibilities] gives a practical example of the taxi dancer's responsibilities. For example, taxi dancers are representatives of that particular organisation, and should behave as such.
Hopefully, those organisations that provide taxi dancers, will introduce them to the beginners — many organisations provide uniforms for taxi dancers and other staff (generally a distinctive fluorescent t-shirt). Ideally, taxi dancers will be proactive in asking beginners to dance. However, if you are unsure of who is “a taxi dancer”, then ask the reception staff.
It is only the first step that is difficult.
Marie de Vichy
Listen to the teacher.
You never know when they might say something useful!
Even experienced dancers will benefit from new ideas — different instructors may be able to give a different perspective or style to a familiar move or technique. Often dancing the move in a class exactly as the teacher may provide new insights — even if you dislike or disagree with that teacher's approach26. If you race ahead in a class because you “know” the move, then you won't improve your understanding and your partner probably won't learn a great deal either. If the move goes wrong, then racing ahead is counter-productive as there's no chance for improvement, since the teacher won't be able to diagnose which element is problematic.
Make a specific point of listening to and clearly performing the movements that they indicate for your partner. For example, if the teacher says that you will be using a specific hand, then indicate which that hand to your partner — especially if you are in an obscure double-handed position, e.g. a contorted version of a hammerlock.
There's probably no dance teacher that has never confused his or her left and right when calling a move.
Watch the teacher. Unfortunately, some teachers may not necessarily explain their precise movements, so be prepared to watch how they actually dance — as opposed to what they say.
If in doubt, ask — even in a class. If you are having trouble understanding a move, then it's highly unlikely that you are the only one who is having trouble. However, be aware that in a class situation teachers won't necessarily be able to answer every question in great depth, as a lengthy discussion would adversely affect the other students' lesson — ideally, teachers will make themselves available for detailed questions after the lesson.
Accept corrections from teachers with a degree of humility, since moves may be unsafe if danced incorrectly.
Unfortunately, teachers rarely hand out written summaries of routines or moves. Even when summaries of routines are available, they may be little more than an ordered list of move names. If you want to remember routines or moves, then the following ideas may help:
Practise moves and techniques from the class in freestyle — try to mix and match class moves with your normal repertoire.
Recap moves and techniques when you get home, even if you have to walk through them without a partner.
Visualise yourself dancing as you go to sleep, executing moves and techniques from classes perfectly.
Try to focus on the different elements of the move. In particular, use your “muscle memory” to recreate the feel of the move, and the feel of the lead (follow).
Move names aren't necessarily crucial, but they can sometimes act as useful hooks for ideas — it may help if you keep a diary of moves, routines and techniques27. Obviously you can ask the teacher at a regular class to recap a move that they have previously taught (although they may not necessarily remember a particular move, if they have taught several classes that week) however, guest teachers and teachers at workshops won't be available after the event — so note taking becomes more important, if you wish to remember precise details.
If you aren't dropping, you aren't learning!
The juggler's motto.
Unfortunately, learning — especially when starting — means that will probably have to move outside of your “comfort zone”, especially if you aren't prepared to mess up: you will make mistakes, and so will your partners — unless you have exceptional natural talent your dancing won't be perfect immediately.
After each lesson try and consider the techniques that you have learnt since the start of the lesson, even if you can't necessarily apply them immediately28. Hopefully, at the end of each lesson you should be able to find some new element, so that your dancing (or at least dance knowledge) will have improved since the start of the lesson.
Classes bring their own pressure not to mess up — but the chances are that you won't be the only student having a problem, so be prepared to ask. Similarly, for followers although there may be a pressure to dance the move correctly, dancing the move as it was led is much more useful in the long term for your partner, and for the teacher who may only provide extra advice if they can see the problem.
Classes are a great opportunity to practise lead and follow, as there are fewer distractions than in freestyle — so try to lead and follow in classes.
Classes are a great opportunity to practise your style, as there are fewer distractions than in freestyle. If you are confident of the taught move, then try to add your own style to the move rather than rushing ahead (and distracting your partner's learning).
Some venues provide a feedback book for comments.
If you keep quiet and don't provide feedback about classes then you aren't helping your teachers improve their service to you and other dancers:
If you enjoy a class, then let the teacher or venue manager know — hopefully that teacher will feature more frequently on the roster.
Similarly, if you find a particular teaching technique effective, then communicating this may aid its adoption by other teachers.
Conversely, if a teacher isn't able to effectively communicate and teach you, then let them know (or the venue manager). Hopefully, your feedback will help indicate areas that could be improved, so that future classes are more effective.
Ok, here's the big secret…
…classes don't help, if you can't apply them…
…you'll only learn to dance freestyle, if you actually dance freestyle…
…if you make mistakes, then congratulations you're learning!
If you don't practise outside of the rigid class environment, then it is difficult to remember moves, learn to improvise, etc.
If you “run away” or hide, then it will probably make it more difficult to ask, or dance, in the freestyle the week after, etc. You can always hide in a far corner of the dance floor and freestyle there.
Obviously, ask the students in your own class — they'll be feeling nervous too, and hopefully keen to practise. Ask the taxi dancers, that's why they are there! Remember who asked you to dance previously, and ask them — they'll probably be delighted to be asked. Then when you're still confident, ask someone new.
Why do I always seem to have problems dancing with a certain partner?
If you are having (non-technical) problems dancing with a particular partner (especially if you are trying to impress them), then part of the problem might be that you have an expectation that the dance will go badly. For example, if previous dances failed to reach your (high) expectations, then it's understandable that you may start to wonder whether your next dance with that partner will also be unsatisfactory. This can lead to a vicious circle, where worrying, getting tense and waiting for something to go wrong, will cause something to go wrong.
Unfortunately, the only advice is to stick to simple moves and try to relax — if you do make a mistake, then make a joke of it, rather than worrying.
There are a couple of important exceptions:
Anyone carrying an injury is perfectly in their rights to limit their dancing to well-known (safe) partners.
At freestyle intervals at competitions you are less likely to get a social dance. You may be turned down for any of a number of legitimate reasons, especially since many competitors will be trying to stay fresh, focused and uninjured for the competition proper, etc. Note that the freestyle intervals during a competition may be curtailed, or dropped completely, if the competition starts to overrun.
Obviously, if a partner's behaviour is dangerous or makes you feel uncomfortable, then you should not feel obliged to accept a dance with them. However, social dancing is both about dancing with others and being sociable — ideally no one will refuse a dance (without a good reason) especially as it can take courage to ask — but this convention should not be abused to monopolise a partner.
There are a few reasons when dancing socially that can be used to decline a request for a dance gracefully:
You are resting (need a drink, change of outfit, etc.).
You have already promised that dance29.
Obviously, if you are happy to accept a dance later and wish to soften the refusal, then offer to dance with them later in the evening.
A direct refusal without any reason suggests that you wish to avoid dancing with that person, rather than for any other reason and may be considered rude — a blunter approach would be to explain exactly why you are declining the offer to dance, but this may be best reserved for the most unsocial of partners.
Note that it is considered impolite to refuse a dance with one person, and then accept the same dance with someone else.
If you are turned down for a dance, don't take it as a personal slight30.
Please feel free to ask me, if you change your mind — I never say no!
Be not forgetful to entertain strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.
The Bible (Hebrews 13:2)
Gentlemen, ask the lady to dance face to face — whatever you do, do not ask the lady's breasts to dance!
There are no restrictions on who can ask, or be asked to dance in Modern Jive
Followers can ask leaders — leaders can ask followers.
Ladies can ask men — men can ask ladies
Beginners can ask more experienced dancers — more experienced dancers can ask beginners.
The more people that you ask, the more people you will get to know. And the more people that you know, the greater the change you will be asked to dance.
Focus your attention when asking your desired dance partner, a vague approach (from a distance) can lead to awkwardness — especially if more than one person thinks that they have been asked.
Be sensitive, repeatedly walking past people to dance with others can make them feel “passed over”.
Obviously, some times are better to ask for a dance than others, e.g. if a dancer has just finished dancing to a long fast song, then they may decline your invitation and prefer to rest for a while.
For a humorous view of asking for a dance, see [Robert Pepper's Website].
A “safe” invitation (with built-in excuse) might be: “Are you resting, or would you care to dance?”31.
[The Strength Of Weak Touch] suggests that you are less likely to be declined if you lightly touch your prospective partner on the arm.
A number of companies host dance events (and competitions) for same sex couples [AfterFive Gay Dancing Map].
Rather than dancing it with their usual more petite partner, teachers may for example reassure a class as to the ease of a particular dip or drop by dancing it with a large, tall man.
In Modern Jive it is quite common at general dances to see a lady leader dancing with a lady follower32. It is less common but not unknown at general Modern Jive events for a male leader to dance with a male follower — or even to see three men dancing double trouble. There is perhaps a longer tradition of a male leader dancing with a male follower in Argentine tango — the catch-22 situation of a man wishing to learn to dance, yet not wishing to seem a beginner when dancing with a woman, was traditionally solved by men practising together.
Sometimes the “traditional” roles are reversed and a lady leader will dance with a male follower.
Swapping the leader role for the follower's (and vice versa) can give new insight to the particular skills required for the “other” role — and may give some ideas of how best to lead, by learning how a particular lead feels.
There is no refund for sitting out.
The “correct” response33 is: “I would love a dance”.
People who enjoy dancing (especially those who are relaxed, smiling and having fun) will attract others. Conversely, if you have declined dances in the past, then you are less likely to be asked in the present.
Location, location, location!
If you are standing or sitting on the edge of the dance floor (or coming off) there is a higher chance of being asked to dance (again). It is unrealistic to assume that if you sit in the furthest, darkest, corner that all the experienced dancers will automatically walk over and ask you to dance. If you want to dance, then you may have to do the asking — you may have to “work the room” and wander around to find someone sat out. If you only turn up occasionally, then you may need to put more effort in to working the room. If there is a large gender imbalance in your favour, then make a special point of asking — next time the situation is reversed some of your partners may remember. You may not get a “world-class” dance every time, but there are many, many surprising gems of dances to be had when you least expect them (and even unprepossessing beginners improve — some dramatically so).
You are less likely to be asked for a dance if you are sitting (at a table), are away from the dance floor (or possibly the bar, etc.), are deep in conversation, smoking, drinking, eating, appear to be in a fixed couple, or are wearing unsuitable shoes or clothes — so put down that cigarette or glass and stand close to the dance floor.
At classes, rather than hoping someone will ask you to dance, introduce yourself to your partners as you rotate in the class and try and arrange a dance for later in the evening, or suggest to your last class partner that you both continue on for the first freestyle dance. Similarly, at dances it'll probably help to turn up to any “mixer” class.
If you want to pay your partner a compliment, then ask them for a second dance.
Once you have managed to get a first dance (even if you have to ask) you may find it easier to dance the next one; either by continuing with your current partner, or by asking another dancer who is also walking off the floor — obviously both of you are happy to (and can apparently) dance, and hopefully you'll be feeling confident from your previous dance. If you have particularly enjoyed a dance, then let your partner know — they may be more likely to ask you again.
Stage an “ambush” — wait where dancers will leave the floor. Standing impatiently shows that you are keen to dance, and you'll be in a good position to ask a dancer walking off the dance floor and vice versa.
Lastly, one obvious way to improve your chances of being asked to dance is to make yourself more appealing by improving your own dancing.
Any form of jump, lift, dip, drop or “acrobatic move” is a potentially dangerous activity — that should be restricted to consenting partners. Leaders should always check that followers are happy to do jumps, drops or other “acrobatic” moves — simply because they've danced them before doesn't mean that they will necessarily be happy to dance them in their current clothes and shoes, or they may feel that the dance floor, dance space, or music are unsuitable.
Other dance styles may have different conventions based on the (perceived) customs from the originating regions, for example, in some more male led dances, followers may not be unfriendly, but may simply not expect to have to ask a leader for a dance.
Argentine tango has an etiquette, or convention, of its own so that a leader's machismo is not “dented” by a public refusal. Before requesting a dance, a leader will make eye contact (cabeceo) with their chosen follower across the room. If the follower maintains eye contact as the leader approaches, then the leader can “safely” assumed that the follower will accept the verbal offer to dance. However, if the follower breaks eye contact as the leader approaches (for whatever reason), then this is considered to be declining the invitation to dance — the leader can easily abort their approach, without having (their ego dented by) a more public verbal refusal. Similarly, followers can indicate their willingness to dance by making eye contact with leaders.
I prefer to be able to dance two tracks with the same partner. Sometimes it takes the first track to discover which elements a partner prefers; and then the second track can be led to that their preferences into account more fully, so that they can really enjoy that dance.
I'm told that in Argentine Tango the conventional minimum number of dances is three — or a set of tracks, if the music is played in sets (tandas).
Opinions differ as to the minimum number of dances, and conventions differ in dance styles and locations. At present, in London and the southeast of the UK, it appears that the conventional minimum number of dances that can be expected is only a single dance. However, in other parts of the UK, the conventional minimum number of dances that can be expected seems to be two dances.
Traditionally, the leader escorts the follower on to the dance floor34.
If you are entering the dance floor, than it is your responsibility to avoid those dancing and not vice versa. So, don't just face your partner and back on to the dance floor, walk on forwards so that you can easily spot other dancers and avoid them.
You should still be careful once you have got onto the dance floor, especially if it is part way through a song, and other couples are already dancing — there is more possibility of a collision, as they may not be notice you immediately.
If the dance is progressive, then entering the dance floor should be treated similarly to joining a motorway — you need to wait until a gap is available in the flow of dancers along the line of dance, and be prepared to accelerate up to the speed of the other dancers. If you join the floor and spend a long time stationary, for example working out which foot to start with, you will just be an obstruction for the other progressive dancers moving along the line of dance. Modern Jivers need to be sensitive and should only enter the dance floor when there are gaps between progressive dancers and locate a suitable area to dance, e.g. in the centre of the dance floor.
Have fun.
Make sure that your partner has fun!
If your partner's top has a “humorous” phrase or slogan, then rather than becoming distracted while dancing, read it once beforehand — claiming to be a slow reader suffering from short-sightedness and using your finger to trace the words is probably “pushing it”.
Conversation is difficult when dancing, because of the volume of the music, and so non-verbal communications are more telling, especially facial expressions (or lack thereof). Hence, look at your partner (not their chest, or your feet) and keep their interest — is your partner still smiling? If your partner winces, pulls a face, rolls their eyes, “tuts”, or otherwise shows their displeasure at a particular move, don't repeat it “just to be sure”, try something else.
Hold your partner's interest — smile, — give them your full attention, and make them feel good (and hopefully look good). Dance with them, not at them, or worse ignoring them — so, make occasional eye-contact (otherwise your dancing might seem impersonal).
Be sensitive to your partner; express yourself when dancing, and let your partner express themselves. For example, if your follower is not happy with a lot of footwork, then don't dance a lot of footwork — in salsa, don't dance a lot of shines, or in Lindy Hop don't dance a lot of breakaway moves, unless your partner enjoys them.
Lead moves that have a good chance of finishing successfully — take special care to catch travelling spins. Leading moves that a follower can follow, even if they haven't danced them before is acceptable, but some so-called educated moves are not directly followable, e.g. a back Charleston.
In social dancing there are no mistakes, just new moves.
“I haven't seen that move before”
“Bet you can't do that again”
Recovering from mistakes is part of the fun. If something unexpected happens, then smile and treat it as a challenge35.
If a lead for a move goes wrong, then it's reasonable to repeat it, or try it again later — rather than halting, looking annoyed, or saying “Oh, I thought everyone knew that one!” which may completely discourage your partner, especially beginners. However, repeatedly forcing the same move is unsociable.
If you keep colliding, or only just avoiding collisions, you should probably rethink the way that you are dancing.
If you collide, or tread, on anyone on the dance floor (including your partner) then stop and apologise.
High heel shoes, especially stilettos, can be extremely painful (especially if wearing sandals) — a 50 Kg. dancer stepping onto a 2 centimetre by 2 centimetre heel generates a great deal of pressure (125 metric tonnes, per square metre).
Keep your elbows in when spinning — taller dancers may find that their elbows are at a head height for shorter dancers.
Collisions can be painful, so check that no one is hurt before you start dancing again.
There's only one teacher in a class!
An occasional helpful word can be useful, but don't start teaching fellow students during a class — it is insulting to both the teacher and your victim.
Don't!
Teaching blocks the dance floor — it also increases the chance of collisions, since you won't be moving with the general flow on the dance floor and will be concentrating on learning, rather than on your floor craft.
If both partners are happy to learn, then they should move off the dance floor and practise in safety.
There are recurring (apocryphal) stories of know it all beginners turning up at a new venue, dancing with a new partner and continually “correcting” them — without realising that their partner is actually one of the local teachers.
Dancing offers a welcome relief to many people from the stresses and strains of daily life, and so an invitation to a social dance is not an invitation to offer unsolicited advice — unless there are inappropriate behaviour or safety issues. Personal comments from strangers, or casual acquaintances can be hurtful, so if you succumb to the temptation to offer a helpful hint, then be sympathetic — constructive criticism is still criticism — and no one likes to be criticised, especially when they are proud of their dancing achievements (however modest).
Followers will be concentrating on: following and musicality, whereas leaders will be concentrating on floor craft, moves, leading and musicality — and hence, some dancers (especially beginning leaders) may not be as definite as they should ideally — don't forget that leaders lead with their left hand, i.e. typically their “non-dominant” hand. Dancers who are less definite in leading and following, are often those least equipped to accept criticism about their lack of assertiveness, i.e. have the “thinnest skins”. In particular, beginners won't be able to assess the validity of the advice they are offered, and can be completely discouraged if they are “taught” outside of the teaching environment.
If you've enjoyed the dance, then let your partner know — maybe they'll ask you to dance later.
Traditionally, the leader escorts the follower back to their seat after a dance.
If you are not dancing to the next tune, leave the floor quickly and quietly — don't loiter, or you'll become an obstacle to those dancing.
Be careful, spilt drinks (or other liquids) can have sudden dramatic effects for dancers wearing suede-soled shoes, as they may make them stick to the floor.
If you drop a drink on, or near to, the dance floor, then make sure that the organisers are informed quickly so that any wet areas or broken glass can be cleaned up.
Obviously, dancers should have the right of way on the dance floor. If you stand (gossiping) on the edge of the dance floor, you will simply become a hazard to those dancing — remember that this is the fast lane for progressive (ballroom) dancers. If you are not dancing, walk around the edge of the dance floor rather than threading your way between dancers, especially when carrying (and potentially spilling) drinks.
Applaud live bands after each number — they'll be happier, and will probably put more expression and effort into the performance, especially if they are not used to dancers who only want to dance, rather than quietly listening to the music — maybe you'll get more encores.
It's a good idea to place requests as early in the evening as possible:
An early request gives the DJ more time to listen to the track, which will let them make a more informed decision.
DJs may play “riskier” requests earlier in the evening, when there are less customers to upset.
Don't forget to thank the DJ if you are enjoying the music. Or if the music isn't to your taste, then you can always try and make a request — maybe a discrete bribe of a drink or two might help.
Although many organisations suggest that you should accept every request for a dance, you are under no obligation to dance with any one who does not show you due consideration. In particular, followers should not feel that they have to dance (or finish a dance) with a leader who hurts them, or whose behaviour is inappropriate.
Just because two people embrace, or kiss, doesn't mean that they will be happy to do so with just anyone. Similarly, just because a dancer chooses to dance one way with a particular partner doesn't mean that they will be happy to dance close the same way with anyone and everyone.
There is an important distinction between dance space and personal space, don't confuse the one for the other, and respect your partner!
Some teachers explain the precise location of the shoulder blade or hip, to avoid any possibility of anatomical confusion, others teach their pupils to wiggle “safely” when both partners are in a cuddle position (from side to side, rather than forwards and backwards).
If you are unsure whether a move is appropriate to dance with a particular partner, then don't just lead it and ask “after the fact” — your uncertainty should suggest that you select one that you know is appropriate. In particular, beginners and more “conservative” dancers may feel uncomfortable dancing close to, or in contact, with partners outside of “normal bounds” of open or closed dance holds. In particular, contact near their (or indeed your) face, chest, stomach, rear, lower body, or legs may be particularly discomforting — especially when dancing with a new partner. Just because a move has been taught in a class or workshop, doesn't immediately make it “safe” — especially moves taught in classes such as dirty dancing or strictly sinful, a sensual dance doesn't have to be sexual. Your partner may be “smiling”, but make sure that it is not because they are embarrassed.
If you abuse a partner's trust you may be asked to leave — at minimum you'll get a dubious reputation and be turned down for dances36.
Both leaders and followers should keep their hands at their partner's waist height — if hands are too high or too low, they may drag around your partner's body “inappropriately”. To avoid inadvertent inappropriate physical contact, leaders (and followers) should assess their partner's height quickly at the start of the dance — there may not be time later especially if you are dancing a move where you reach (out of sight) for your partner, e.g. if their hip is higher, or lower, than you expect — you will take hold of something else!
Be sensitive when leading “wrap” moves, e.g. Cuddles, that leave the follower directly in front of you. Aside from obvious problems, such moves may feel claustrophobic for beginner followers, and since the follower will be typically backing you, you may not easily be able to sense any discomfort. To make the move less constricting for their follower, a leader should ideally use a light hold. Additionally, if only the tips of the follower's fingers are held in the tips of the leader's fingers, then this will effectively increase the length of the joint handhold which should be less constricting for both of you.
If as a leader, you find it difficult to gauge an appropriate separation in dance hold, then let the follower determine how close they are held, i.e. the follower indicates if (when) the minimum distance that they are comfortable with has been reached37. In a closed dance hold, one technique a follower can use to indicate their preferred distance is to adjust their left hand so that it points upwards with fingers just on top of the leader's right shoulder, and the heel of their left hand against the front of the leader's right shoulder (chest). If the leader starts to pull the follower in too close (for the follower) then the follower can use pressure with their left hand and arm to indicate that they feel that they are close enough. If the leader continues to pull the follower in past their comfort zone, then the follower can then use their left hand and arm to push the leader's shoulder away to maintain an acceptable degree of separation.
If you ever feel uncomfortable with a partner's behaviour tell your friends, the event's organisers38, or ultimately the police.
Although dancing may be intimate — unwelcome physical contact should never take place. If your partner does something that makes you feel uneasy, there is always the option of saying “I'm sorry, that makes me feel uncomfortable — I want more space please!”
In the extremely unlikely event of unwelcome follower behaviour, leaders can take direct preventative measures by leading fast moves that maintain space between them and the follower.
As a male author, it is difficult to suggest how a (female) follower should deal with unwelcome behaviour on the dance floor — obviously a confident enough person can make a scene and sweep off the floor with a dramatic exit, but this seems slightly too trite an answer for those less confident. However, the only thought I have for a subtle exit is to “noisily trip/fall over your own feet” — this might help to distance you from your “partner”, attract attention from neighbouring dancers, and serve as an obvious excuse to avoid further “dancing” — just don't hurt yourself!
In the unlikely event of unwelcome leader behaviour, it is unfortunately more difficult for followers to take direct preventative measures — however, it should always be an possible to leave the floor immediately, rather than having to wait for the “dance” to finish.
If there is an “honest” mistake or misunderstanding, then apologise immediately and dance “safer”39.
Although the “dance world” is generally a safe and happy one, it may not always be so.
Dancing isn't a universal panacea; while some dancers may find a new life partner, others may lose a current one, or indeed both.
Some posters on message boards have expressed concern that the Jive Aces (a popular band at Modern Jive events in the UK) are linked with L. Ron Hubbard's Church of Scientology, see http://jiveaces.scientology.org (as are their helpers who offer free massages — reputedly termed “assists” — at some Modern Jive venues).
Where possible, watch your drinks (especially, if the drinks are easily identifiable as yours) — so that they can't be tampered with, or spiked.
I've never had a problem at any dance event — no one's ever tried to steal my sweaty laundry or trainers — but there have been reports of thefts from a UK dance venue recently.
Where possible, leave any valuables in a safe location at any event (or preferably leave them at home). Note, if you are sharing a room at a weekender event, not all chalets, hotels, etc. have duplicate (triplicate) sets of keys — circumstances may dictate that you (or a roommate) have to leave an empty room unlocked, e.g. to avoid locking out yourself, or your roommate — if this is an issue, it may be worth seeking assurances from the event organisers about the mechanics of room sharing and key availability.
Don't walk home alone.
If you get a lift to the venue, check that you have enough cash to get home — in case you or your lift have to leave early. Carry the phone number for a reputable cab firm (be wary of unlicensed taxis prowling near night club venues; legitimate drivers should obviously know who they are collecting and have a licence displayed on their cab).
Take care not to drive tired — especially if you have been dancing late (or especially early), e.g. at a dance weekend.
19“Kissing with Confidence” lyrics by Jacob Brackman, Lynn Goldsmith, Rodger Nile Gregory, Todd Rundgren and Steve Winwood; performed by Will Powers; “Dancing for Mental Health”, 1983.
20Event and company names such as “Jive Addiction”, “JiveBug”, “Jive Krazy”, “Jive Madness”, etc. and slogans such as “Pure Dance Addiction” suggest that this effect has been recognised commercially — Modern Jivers often describe “being hooked”, c.f. “Jiveoholic”. This effect is not restricted to Modern Jive it has been recognised in Salsa, Lindy, and Tango — to name but a few!
21Including research into the stresses and strains undergone by dance attire.
22Complex carbohydrate foods, e.g. wholemeal bread or pasta, will provide consistent energy over an evening. Foods with more simple sugars, such as chocolate or carbonated drinks, are digested more quickly, and hence can lead to rapid fluctuations in energy. Combining a sugar low with an endorphin low can be quite unpleasant.
23Vegetarian omega-3 supplements (derived from algae) are available, e.g. from [HealthSpan].
24Optionally, waistcoat, cummerbund, cufflinks and braces.
25Shoe brushes are simply a specialised form of small wire brush — hardware shops may stock suitable inexpensive alternatives.
26Sometimes you may dislike a particular approach simply because it forces you to think differently — at least if you try the technique you have the option of using it after the class.
27A police-style notepad (with an elastic band to keep it shut) is discrete, easy to carry in a trouser back pocket and useful for making notes after class.
28It is more productive to concentrate on your own learning process, rather than trying to compare yourself to other students. Some students will have different talents to yours, others may simply have more time to attend different classes, while others may be beginners in one dance technique, but may have extensive knowledge from other techniques that may account for their apparent “over night” success.
29Traditionally, partners accompanying each other at an event will dance the first and last dances together.
30If several potential partners decline dances (repeatedly) with you, then this may suggest that there may be an opportunity to improve one or more of your dancing, hygiene, etc.
31If you accept an offer to dance, tell your partner if there are moves that you want to avoid, e.g. neck rolls, back bends, etc. — especially if you are pregnant, injured, or have restricted mobility. Leaders should never lead jumps, or lifts without permission.
32As immortalised by Joyce Grenfel in [Old Tyme Dancing — Stately As A Galleon].
33Or possibly, the traditional exchange: “You dancing?”, “You asking?”, “I'm asking”, “I'm dancing”.
34Escorting your partner on to the dance floor has the added advantage that it makes it harder for them to “escape”.
35The social dance floor is not the place for detailed postmortems — and could be construed as nagging. If a follower is having difficulty interpreting your lead, then accommodate them by leading some simpler moves clearly — if you want to improve your own dancing, then consider how your own leading, style or musicality might be improved, rather than going for that “next big move”.
36It shouldn't come as any surprise that dancers love to gossip when they aren't dancing. For example, the women at my old Jive club would regularly use coded nicknames to swap notes about the male dancers and their behaviour on (and off) the dance floor.
37Hint: this may depend on your personal hygiene!
38From a strictly commercial perspective, a single “abusive dancer” can put off many others from attending — especially since many incidents may be unreported. Ideally, there should be a well-defined feedback (complaints) procedure at every class or event — obviously issues need to be reported in a timely manner (with a detailed unambiguous description of any problematic partner — to avoid confusion) if you wish the organiser to take action.
39Once may be an accident… twice may be a coincidence… but three times?